It's calmer than it has been, but I can't calm down enough to sleep. Im 43 years old, 4 sons, married, and every day feel like Im going to lose it, go crazy, wind up in mental institution. I argue this because the design process for all software is based on a starting set of requirements "A". Scotland news, UK and world news. Youll need to seek a combination of 1) counseling and therapy and 2) an antidepressant medication. How to connect 2 VMware instance running on same Linux host machine via emulated ethernet cable (accessible via mac address)? Anyone here running their own DNS server with some specific type of software for that very reason? Katerndahl DA. Jan 13, 2021. The XY problem is asking about your attempted solution rather than your actual problem. And (to pick, oh, one): stackoverflow has been atrocious in this regard in the last few years. It was like "Aha!" normal user: thinks that "there are two equivalent figures, the 'total triangles' in a perfect 135 grid", following with the question: expert user: think something like "oops, they are alike (close in shape), but not perfectly equivalent figures", following with the question: The clever geometry-expert thinks in terms of close in shape geometries. But I have no control on the server's home directory and "../conf" is not an acceptable place. You are more likely simply having a rough time or are dealing with a mental health challenge. Read the question again and read this answer notice the three parts? However, there are some instances where racing thoughts and feeling out of control may indicate a more serious mental illness. But I can't stress how important it is. I got robbed at gunpoint at my job and feeling anxious to Had the worst panic attack of my life after an edible, I need good feel good movies because anxiety. Therefore it is unavoidable, Asking Questions where you risk falling into XY. What does "user was removed" mean and why did my reputation change because of it? I woke up with a head injury, about ten years ago. CounsellingResource.com is accredited by the Health on the Net Foundation. WebView all results for thinkgeek. Excellent answer, excellent observations, excellent leadership-by-example. What is Y supposed to be used for? Which tools and technologies are used to build the Stack Exchange Network? I told my boyfriend everything and we moved on. The brain attempts to manage the additional stress and as a result, our brain levels of the neurotransmitter Serotonin decrease. After 3 E.R. I go from being completely calm to crying over whatever's happening in my head. enormous amounts of wasted time and energy, both on the part of people asking The method takes a little longer to answer in the first instance but closes the Q/A loop much more quickly. 0 comments. Answering OP's situation vs. actual question? You could be losing touch with reality. Exhibitionist & Voyeur 03/19/19: College Night Ch. Both depersonalization and derealization are dissociative disorders, which are characterized by a disconnection between ones thoughts and ones self or identity. It is overseen by the same international advisory board of distinguished academic faculty and mental health professionals with decades of clinical and research experience in the US, UK and Europe that delivers CounsellingResource.com, providing peer-reviewed mental health information you can trust. Akeem Marsh, MD, is a board-certified child, adolescent, and adult psychiatrist who has dedicated his career to working with medically underserved communities. Does your simplification produce something strange, change the context? Youll need to seek a combination of 1) counseling and therapy and 2) an antidepressant medication. I wake up and I feel it constantly. In their attempt to finish first in the break up race, they always end up finishing last. I dont know, maybe posters can anticipate when people will say its an XY problem. I also think this answer is a needed addition to the explanation. But the cost of edit (time and attention expensive), and the perception that it is a kind of pollution in your text (a "bad marketing" for the question), are downsides. it sounds so absurd now that i write it down like this. Im definitely going to block and try to occupy my time better. So, your rational mind might know that everything is OK, but another part of your mind is convincing you that that is not the case. ; 2 Just an exhausting rundown of every Le Creuset deal happening right now Secret Le Creuset discounts are the best kind; 3 Grab these designer gifts under $150 at Nordstrom Answer (1 of 12): If you are going crazy because of her character and personality than the beauty of her body then it will last long. If you say "That's going to be really hard. This can lead to frustration by people who are trying to help you solve the problem because by the time you ask about it, the solution that you need help with might not have any obvious connections to the problem that you are trying to solve. I disagree with the answer. Are there breakers which can be triggered by an external signal and have to be reset by hand? I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and all that jazz, so if you have any corrections, feel free to drop me a line. As Serotonin continues to decrease, it reaches a level where obsessive-compulsive behavior develops. Importantly, its highly unlikely that you are actually losing your mind. I told him I'd get help for this but I have to wait. i want to seek help from the counsellor but at the same time, i want to keep believing in it. I would add that the purpose of this site is not just to help the person originally asking the question, but also to create a repository for anyone else who finds the question later. When asking questions, how do I recognize when I'm falling into it? Testing attribute self axis fails"; the real problem is that @attribute::self does not exist, so it was a wrong hypothesis on the title of the question. See "XPath for xml:lang? "Why would you do that?" Then part of the question becomes an explanation of why you need to do Y. Sabine begins to really like being nude. "Because I have to" "What is Y / Do not do this/ why are are you using {antipattern}?" @Tom That's fine, in those cases the "you are asking for something that is really hard" or "you shouldn't do this, it's a really bad idea" type part (1) are entirely appropriate. Stack Overflow's help/mcve rationale: "How to create a Minimal, Complete, and Verifiable Example", can be used to avoid the XY problem. "Because I have to". about tips. 01 (4.54): Elsa and Ken get ready for their Archaeological Dig. We will never stop people asking these questions so the best thing is to understand how we can answer them quickly and effectively. I get why someone will pretend that theyre okay after the dissolution after a break up. (It mostly seems to answer a different question, "Why is the XY problem bad?"). rev2022.12.9.43105. But if I had wanted a solution for Y or Z, this is what I had asked. X = the employee's overall take-home pay has been stagnant for the last several years, while their cost of living continually increases; the employee needs more take-home pay. It detracts from the question to have to go over all the possible X's that you've already ruled out, and delve into office politics or existing system architecture. i want to believe that i'm still sane. How do I avoid it? Imo this is the one which should be on top.No offense on the top answer,but I first read that and it made me scratch my head and then I came down to see this and the answer got crystal clear to me. I don't have any good ideas for an alternative name though. i've never managed to actually physically hurt anyone, i didn't have the heart to do it. Sometmes you are stuck with Y. I m not kidding when I say that shit s dangerous and has the power to fuck up your life. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. If you don't, then you'd better not assume what the X is, because the presented Y, Sometimes that's pretty much right. Hes all over Reddit pretending to be this super fun, supportive, and overall great human & in my brain Im like how dare you? Specific to Q&A, the perniciousness of an XY problem comes from the fact that it is frustrating for everyone involved: For example, you are trying to solve an issue: how to compost your household organic waste. Aiming for Y (taking a position) is aiming for a very specific and limited solution to the problem (X). I read the above, tried to think about my current problem (whether it is an X or Y question), and when I read on to this comment, I got the "aha" moment of understanding that if I would have posted my question, I would have inquired about the Y not the X. It will hurt. There s no remedy. @trixn, of course you can point someone in the right direction, and of course you can guide someone toward a new way of looking at something. Add a new light switch in line with another switch? J Holist Nurs. WebGet NCAA football news, scores, stats, standings & more for your favorite teams and players -- plus watch highlights and live games! 03 (4.59) Sabine and Jack. i've never felt so stuck in my life, even during the two years i felt so terrible. Get the latest tips on health and wealth from Dumb Little Man. I do not own this song. I am 21 and in the military. The people who never allow themselves to openly grieve are the ones who actually never get over anything. Ironically a lot of these bad answers and responses are given by those wanting to be the most helpful and can be given by some of the most reputable people on the forum / SO. Feeling as though you are losing your mind is a very scary idea! Well, you can't do that in Java. Why Am I Having Racing Thoughts at Night? But it is not a natural or practical solution. How Parents Can Help Teens With Panic Disorder, Dissociation After Trauma May Indicate Increased Mental Distress in the Future, How to Identify and Cope With Your PTSD Triggers, DSM-5 Criteria for Diagnosing Panic Disorder, Why Panic Attacks Cause Shortness of Breath, How to Recognize and Cope With Panic Attack Symptoms, How to Manage Panic Attacks With Meditation, Daily Tips for a Healthy Mind to Your Inbox, The Effects of Mindfulness Meditation on Stress and Burnout in Nurses, Feeling as though you are in danger, even if you arent, Feeling detached from yourself, or the world around you, Unable to stop worrying thoughts or unsettling thoughts and images, Not being able to sit still or concentrate, Feeling like you are detached from your body, Feeling as though you are on the outside of your life, looking in, Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR). Covering all the latest headlines and full reports e.g. i don't know how to describe the way i experienced this shift in mindset because i do not remember how. Add a Comment. Now as time passes I feel like im going crazy. You want to solve the real question-X, and you think in terms of an Y-context, and try to use question-Y. Do your homework, read up on depression, and arrange for treatment. WebPopular Stories. Group Sex 07/07/06: A Hot Summer Day: 6 Part Series: A Hot Summer Day (4.42): He finds out his wife wants to expand their marriage. I find this a little bit embarrassing, not only because the answers I get don't belong to my question, but also because I feel myself underestimated. See examples at this question/answer. 2. Wendy Wisner is a health and parenting writer, lactation consultant (IBCLC), and mom to two awesome sons. Do non-Segwit nodes reject Segwit transactions with invalid signature? I know I shouldnt look, but I do. The discussion took place in Pillsburys auditorium. You didnt do any more than you currently remember. No family content except for you, your partner/ex & your children (no abusive kids). You can have increased anxiety because of a particularly stressful situation. The first speaker was a vice president of Kraft named Michael Mudd. The Effects of Mindfulness Meditation on Stress and Burnout in Nurses. i don't want to go insane, but i don't want to recover. A: How to write an operating system with regex? I was raped before , How do I tell my boyfriend that? Anxiety disorders, including general anxiety and panic disorder, respond well to various types of therapy and medications, including: Depersonalization/derealization symptoms also respond well to therapy and medication. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. Why does it seem to get worse the longer were not with Press J to jump to the feed. The easiest way to get to the real problem is usually asking Why five times. Common Signs and Symptoms of Too Much Stress. Could we please be a bit nicer to new users? It's 2 am, I've been up since 7:30 am, and I don't feel tired. This creates that sense of fighting with your own thoughts. Symptoms of anxiety disorders that are related to a feeling of losing ones mind include: Experiencing a panic attack can be a very scary experience. I dont think people realize how much strength it takes to pull your own self out of a poisonous situation with someone you love deeply. We have before us an ordeal of the most grievous kind. Meta Stack Exchange is intended for bugs, features, and discussions that affect the whole Stack Exchange family of Q&A sites. In addition to his Ask the Psychologist replies, Dr Carver has published several essays on the main Counselling Resource site, including: All clinical material on this site is peer reviewed by one or more clinical psychologists or other qualified mental health professionals. The jar normally sits in x/bin and the configuration sits in x/conf. That being said, there is something wrong herebut its not what you think. What should I do when I want to add additional questions or scenario to my question? My point was about your statement that admonishing XY problems is particularly noob-unfriendly. all rights reserved. Anxiety Disorders and Panic Attacks. Antidepressant medications work to increase the levels of Serotonin in the brain. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. WebRead latest breaking news, updates, and headlines. It's 2 am, I've been up since 7:30 am, and I don't feel tired. This answer does not answer any of the three questions being asked: what is the XY problem? IMHO this answer would be improved by mentioning what X and Y are. 8. After much interaction and wasted time, it finally becomes clear that the user Understanding the stress response. I stopped myself from peeking for so long but every once in a while I get the urge. D: If it's JavaScript (and that is, except for missing outer braces), JSON can probably parse it, D: I didn't say it explicitly: JSON only parses data structures, not JS code, Q: That's all I need parsed is a data structure. Why would Henry want to close the breach? you know youve been programming for a while when the constant sound of a metro nome is playing in the back of your head as youre trying to go to sleep original sound - Dakota Robledo. 22 comments. One in four adults experiences this type of depression. If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out. im going insane feeling like this every single day . In that case you shall let her know slowly indirect way. Usually, I do not want people to solve my problem, just answer my question. So, the use of wrong hypothesis, produce ill Y questions. User doesn't know how to do X, but thinks they can fumble their way to a That's why I usually ask for more information about the use-case. Search our huge selection of new and used video games at fantastic prices at GameStop. Let me explain: its been hyped up everywhere and when that happens, expectations tend to run very high. SO did not really help me there. Im a fan of books that challenge our assumptions, and Diamond offers us a new and remarkably simple way of looking at our world. If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out. i hope that you are able to understand all of this. That is the X might be contained within the context of the original question but the MCVE will be constructed solely to express Y. London. We can think in terms of some main situations: Rush situation: the wrong hypothesis is only a language or over-simplification side-effect, that can be corrected by the user with a little more attention, and investing more time editing the question. It might be better for you to ask the Q&A forum about how to solve the original issue you were trying to solve. I feel like I'm in the 4th dimension, like an outside viewer just looking at everything as life goes by. Check out the latest breaking news videos and viral videos covering showbiz, sport, fashion, technology, and more from the Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday. WebHowever, to start with the notion that the question formation itself is somehow wrong is what I'm at strong odds with. "I need to do Y because legacy/boss/old framework" then the question becomes easier to answer, and more valuable to all. Read our. Because of this, I'd rather not given them an answer that will be misused. Algorithm for a good question: If an MCVE is not practical, try at least to simplify. Why does the distance from light to subject affect exposure (inverse square law) while from subject to lens does not? WebA Promise by Moonlight: 7 Part Series: A Promise by Moonlight Pt. If its the first time you are experiencing one, you might not know what is even happening, and you may feel as though you are losing your mind. The crucial thing is to carry on talking about the question but move from answering it to providing helpful information. Im 38 and have suffered from Depression and OCD most of my life but have always been able to manage it on medication until last year when my depression got worse, first I thought it was just to do with the pandemic, and everyone was feeling the same but it just kept going down. Meta Stack Exchange is a question and answer site for meta-discussion of the Stack Exchange family of Q&A websites. How to Cope When Things Don't Go as Planned. searching for alternative solutions. I went to Target today to challenge my agoraphobia. Sorry in advance. 1988;26(1):49-52. Other: Oh, I see. National Institute of Mental Health. To avoid falling into this trap, always include information about a broader picture along with any attempted solution. Review to avoid errors. Still ask the same question but give as much pertinent information as possible: This will help people identify that its XY and help you much more quickly. But too often part 3 is given on it's own and it is extremely frustrating and patronising to the OP not to mention a lot of OPs will not accept the answer. If you do, then you're well aware of the X. -Horacio Jones. It's my experience that the the MCVE creates more XY problems not less. Most can be solved with stress relief or help from a mental health professional. Because after all that's what you think the OP needs. "Why Your First Idea Can Blind You to a Better One" explains an example from chess where a person wins with a 5-move smothered mate in one game. Wendy Wisner is a health and parenting writer, lactation consultant (IBCLC), and mom to two awesome sons. Although its a good thing that my vision is clearer, it doesn't feel good. By Wendy Wisner how can such a young person lose themselves for virtually no reason at all? Even though I know I didnt and I talked to girlfriends there with me and they said I did nothing of the sort. The codebase was a rotten mixof html PHP and js. Actually, admonishing XY problems is particularly noob-unfriendly. The best thing you can do about the XY problem is to guard against it when asking questions. #WeStickTogether #MickeyFriendsStayTrue #lightingdesign #lightingprogrammer". During spiritual awakening, you realize how crazy the world really is, but you also realize something even more important: that you are not an exception. Too often I see responses (comments) asking "why do you need that?". They put up a facade to convince themselves and others that they are someone they are not. A more universal (non-programming) example would be even more helpful. this. As your depression intensifies, you will become more obsessed to the point that you will volunteer to end the relationship with your boyfriend due to what you feel is your past even though youre not sure what events were present. My source was Scientific American, if you object you can take it up with them ;). PS: On the other hand, when we explain and show all the details, all the context, and check the real point, the assembly of the problem (like when using mcve), the inconsistencies also show with more evidence. The brain will often become fixated on a single event or experience, Try Online Counseling: Get Personally Matched, Stockholm Syndrome: The Psychological Mystery of Loving an Abuser, Emotional Memory Management: Positive Control Over Your Memories, Depression: Understanding Causes, Symptoms and Treatment. Example. We have before us many, many long months of struggle and of suffering.You ask, what is our policy? TED's editors chose to feature it for you. To be fair, many times questioners ask about X, and the response is "that's too much, break it down to a small example" and so the poster isolates their attempted solution Y and everybody loses sight of the original problem. i feel slightly better now, i just needed somewhere to vent. Trans Lifeline (877-565-8860) i suddenly felt like suffering was the only correct way to exist, and that i should inflict it on others as well to let them know how good it felt. i don't know where to start, but i've been feeling depressed since mid 2020. just to clarify, i've never gotten a doctor's diagnosis. Tennessee Statewide Crisis Phone Line. Someone less experienced might benefit from having other's review alternative X's and suggest they reconsider that precondition. Web'Im so glad this baby is getting justice': Woman finds kitten double bagged in the trash, police discovers criminal's name in that same garbage and make an arrest Now, the woman who rescued the kitten and the police who helped book the criminals both say they're more than happy to adopt the sweet baby. A study showed that mindfulness meditation helped to decrease stress in nurses. Nobody would believe me if I tried to tell them what hes really like. I laughed out loud after I finished reading this and checked back. Heres what happens: Try Online Counseling: Get Personally Matched(Please read our important explanation below.). It illustrates a simple and universal problem/question/solution process, where "some illusion" causes complications. United Kingdom: 116 123. The best answers are voted up and rise to the top. All over a couple presentations and a rough patch in a relationship. So much kept popping up everyday things that are insignificant and it made me feel like what else am I going to remember one day, and how long is this going to go on? People forget things anyway, over time. All the latest breaking UK and world news with in-depth comment and analysis, pictures and videos from MailOnline and the Daily Mail. it's night time right now so i'm hoping that this feeling is just a one day thing and that i'll feel better tomorrow. But generally speaking I don't agree that pointing an asker towards that is noob-unfriendly as it might in fact be what he/she actually needs. B: I don't understand what you mean, but I doubt there's already a function, Q: I tried partition The XY problem is only a problem insofar as the person asking the question lacks the experience to know if the solution they're asking about is the right solution. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. If you see the "cross", you're on the right track. For some reason I cant see any further comments, but thank you everyone for the support. I think a better example from chess would be something like a player being focused on trying to achieve a complicated checkmate with insufficient material, while overlooking the fact they have a pawn which could queen. In extreme cases, mental breakdown symptoms might mean youre feeling suicidal. hotlinehelpbot 5 min. For example, you might be experiencing more stress than usual in your life and that, in turn, exacerbates your anxiety disorder. Webdj Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. So, the program reads its configuration from ../conf. I've never dealt with anything like this before. USA: 18002738255 US Crisis textline: 741741 text HOME. Posted by same_nights. What you are experiencing is very common in a stress-produced depression. Just like how they masked in front of you to get you to be with them. its driving me crazy. I'd rather risk offending them to get to the correct solution than further contribute to both bad code and flawed logic. I am so tired of living like this. SEO Experts Guide to a GA4 Landing Page Report. :-). This is easier to do in a fully interactive chat (regardless of what mode), but on a SE site, where you polish a post a bit, post it, and then have 5-30 mins, or longer, before feedback, it really helps to head in the right direction from the start. 129 Likes, TikTok video from Dakota Robledo (@dakotarobledo5): "makes me feel like Im going insane. Hebrews 1:3 What is the Relationship Between Jesus and The Word of His Power? And that continues to the point we say that "I can achieve X if I do Y". You arent interested in people telling you, I wouldnt do it like that if I were you. You just want the answer to a certain theoretical question. @LegoStormtroopr Except many people don't understand that. There are a self-evident problem the 11 hole in that arises on the second figure , but the solution is evident only after we know (like an Egg of Columbus) All people, experts and non-experts, agree that there is a problem. I got a comment on my question which, although it might have been Y, led to comments including higher-level (manager-like) development plans instead of solving the question in hand. We support abusive relationships from romance, work, roommates & friends. D: There's a few libraries, but simplistic formats are easy enough -- if you don't care about error handling People who have anxiety disorders may become anxious for seemingly no reason at all. Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. What HTML tags are allowed on Stack Exchange sites? I'm pretty sure that all the intentional grammatical errors in the comments are going to drive me insane. That being said, dealing with this type of thought, and the feelings that go along with it, can be very challenging. No demands to explain our rules or "just curious" requests; Why being Love Bombed, Devalued and Discarded by a Has anyones narc every purposely sabotaged their the disrespect is all the closure you need. Sometimes the thought itself can induce even more stress or anxiety. Im honestly so intrigued by the delusion. Start here for a quick overview of the site, Detailed answers to any questions you might have, Learn more about Stack Overflow the company. Incidentally. And then all of a sudden I started to think what if one day I remember something terrible? We usually do this so fast we don't even think about the process. after the examination, i thought i could be free from all the pressure and that i could focus solely on my mental health but now, i think it played a key role in not letting me fall apart again. Should I give a brutally honest feedback on course evaluations? You will not suddenly remember a terrible experience in the middle of your future life. Youre not blocking out hidden memories or traumas, Youve not done something terrible that you dont remember, and. i considered myself pathetic because of it. why?") So let's put focus on the normal situation. @OliverA. i felt like i was on the brink of tears during school. Welcome! 7 Tips For Selecting a Performance Marketing Agency It is a first step, and perhaps I will not need any other questions after obtaining the correct hypothesis (and trying to solve by myself). i don't remember how i came to this conclusion either, but i believe i'm in a dream right now and that everyone and everything around me is just a figment of my imagination. i want to make their job easier, but the confusion is just really getting to me right now. I can say: It is to wage war, by sea, land and air, with all our might and with all the strength that God can give us; to wage war against a monstrous tyranny, never surpassed in the dark, i had a big examination coming up (which has been done recently) so she helped me manage my stress levels and what not. and become unable to take a step back. Location. I just want to be normal. WebLike (1.8M) Share. Trying to understand further than this will drive you insane (edit: I didn t even notice your title when I said this). I want to be able to quit Finder but can't edit Finder's Info.plist after disabling SIP. Explain why you need it we may be able to help" then in a lot of cases an OP will simply take the "Y is really hard" and go back to the drawing board That's fine because you've answered their question and they may well come back with question X themselves. It often goes something like solution if they can just manage to do Y. How is it not applicable to X? The sequence of panic symptoms. As the levels come up, the obsessive guilt and thoughts will gradually fade returning to your memories. around 5-6 months ago, i sought help from my school counsellor and i've been determined to recover and fix myself ever since. Off-topic: What are good ways to answer such questions when they're encountered? My conversations with my partner are all over the place. This is a depression and has nothing to do with making out in the past or actually any of your past experiences. i just want someone to tell me that i'm still sane. Thats whats made it so hard for me to stop gaslighting myself and to believe the abuse actually happened, because 90% of this guys entire friend group is in the LGBTQ community, meanwhile he would make biphobic comments to me about me being bisexual. ago. There are many types of situations that can trigger stress, including a difficult job situation, family or marital conflict, stress from a health crisis, parenting stress, or stress from hearing about troubling world events. Get information on latest national and international events & more. If he had met some scary fish, he would immediately return to the surface. Great explanation. really wants help with X, and that Y wasn't even a suitable solution for X. i don't even know why i feel like this. Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. I just turned 25 and I feel like my life is over. So this is WHY she left you. Thats mine 100%. One year ago, I lost 30 pounds in 6 weeks and became extremely sick. it's the only thing i can think about. Let's hold language in comments to the same standard as posts. Answer the OP's question. How to Fix a Relationship After Cheating . Test, check for inconsistencies, simulate the reader and review. WebThe destination for all NFL-related videos. Additionally, people with bipolar disorder as well as depressive I m desperately hurt too. The problem occurs when people get their train of thought stuck on one approach Solve X This is what you've been itching to do and is the whole point of your response after all. If you are experiencing thoughts of self-harm, suicide, are hearing voices, are unable to sleep or eat, you should seek emergency medical care. The reiteration of my situation could be a mental block focused on how I am solving the problem rather than clearly stating the problem I want to solve is very helpful. Thank you. WebDiscover the latest breaking news in the U.S. and around the world politics, weather, entertainment, lifestyle, finance, sports and much more. for help, and on the part of those providing help. i feel like the only way for me to wake up is to commit suicide, but i don't have any plans for that at the moment. Too often the OP takes the answer to Y and runs, without reading on or realizing that Y was the wrong solution to X. This website has depression screening tests and additional information about depression. 2.1. Your expert knows they the start & end shapes are not technically similar but merely "close in shape". I argue that you can't avoid it. Mine is the same way, my therapist told me that theres certain types of narc men out there that act like feminists to get women to see them as safe so they have easier access to them. She probably has no idea what she wants and simply changed her mind. and specify they wish to ask the question as it is and it can be accepted, for example. If I could, I would give this a thousand upvotes. Is it okay to dispute the premise of a question? You have just fallen into the XY problem! This gives the OP nothing. J Fam Pract. There were 2 ways to fix problems: Redo the whole thing (declined by boss) add more tape. All on FoxSports.com. This creates that sense of fighting with your own thoughts. That said, you shouldnt just brush off these thoughts or hope that they will go away on their own. Over 2 years ago I got drunk and made out with guys. (Content warning: health anxiety) I'm really afraid to be like holy shit am i ever going to be able to do anything Press J to jump to the feed. Where does the idea of selling dragon parts come from? From there you say "I can achieve A if I do B and C". But you use it to mean everyday "close in shape". Now I want to run that within a tomcat server by calling the program's main method myself. Many people who experience panic attacks end up having several of them in a row, which can add to the feeling of feeling out of control, and like your mind is betraying you. It just makes me want to try harder to put him on blast and make sure the entire world knows what kind of person he truly is but I know deep down that wont actually bring me any peace. :-) Might not be your best solution to X, but it's still interesting To subscribe to this RSS feed, copy and paste this URL into your RSS reader. Preach it, Allie. why? Me: (sigh) OK, I have an executable jar for a program that listens to a port and exchanges messages. Yeah the symptoms had been diminished a lot , But Ive been expericing new symptoms: Depersonalization and deralization nearlly every day. I come across this almost daily in my line of work where customers come to me asking how to do some obscure thing on the platform I work with/for. Im embarrassed that I dated a narcissist for 2 years. This interest/position paradigm seems relevant to asking questions on SO, when OP asks for help making their position work. As a so-called normal person, youve always been leading a crazy life, you simply didnt notice it. IMO XY problems are sometimes useful because the answers could help the questioner understand why their solution wouldn't work, and better understand the original problem in the process. Tennessee Department of Mental Health & Substance Abuse Services. If my question helps to show that the real problem is my wrong hypothesis, it is OK! Sometimes you may have highly specific desires in a situation and you just want to know how a certain something might be possible. Many of us have had the thought, I feel like Im losing my mind at one time or another. WebIGN is the leading site for PC games with expert reviews, news, previews, game trailers, cheat codes, wiki guides & walkthroughs Like I slept with someone? Many of the symptoms of depersonalization and derealization are apt to make someone think, I feel like Im losing my mind.. What do you want to do? I've discovered a method of answering these questions which appears to help get round the psychology associated with XY problems and lead the OP of a question to a working solution. By clicking Accept all cookies, you agree Stack Exchange can store cookies on your device and disclose information in accordance with our Cookie Policy. "How to y?" If you continue to use this website without changing your cookie settings or you click "Accept" below then you are consenting to this. I get to the point of feeling like I should check myself into a phsychiatric hospital, and I get so scared, but I know I am normal. The Missing square puzzle problem is a good illustration. Russian translation for ru.stackoverflow.com, There's also Japanese translation for ja.stackoverflow.com, interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/questions/1495/, Why Your First Idea Can Blind You to a Better One, XPath for xml:lang? Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. Can we admit that this is the worst possible name for this problem? The problem is really about how to parse JavaScript data structures, not find "a string between two delimiters", yet it takes quite a bit of time and intuition to get to the real issue. He and I are still together and plan to get married. If you have experienced a trauma or a period of intense anxiety and/or panic attacks, you might start to experience depersonalization or depersonalization. I have no interest in spelling out the entire scope of my issue (especially when working on closed-source proprietary software at my job), and I feel like (excluding dealing with those who insist on traversing up the chain with "why? So it would be better if you used "close in shape" & not "similar". This actually answers the actual question properly while others just simply stated facts. Most people are here to learn so parts 1 and 2 of this answer are as important as part 3. You are not going insane. Saying to yourself, I feel like Im losing my mind isnt just a thoughtit usually comes with a plethora of physical and emotional manifestations. The counter-example: Me: Is there any way to change the current directory in Java? (separated from my other answer because this one has more opinion than explanation), If you agree that the "XY Problem" is only another (more specialized) term for "Use of wrong working hypothesis", as illustrated and explained here, and similar to the "Einstellung effect" explained here by @Jonathan Benn. I'm going insane. Giving this answer also avoids embarrassment when you think the OP has an XY problem when in fact they don't. If so, fair point. "; But I wonder if sometimes, aiming for Y isn't just as valuable. Exhibitionist & Voyeur 04/25/19 I feel like I'm becoming mentally unstable and I am going to break. In my first job I had to modify a webshop. Everything seems to be dull and i have problems with my vision too . @trixn, I'm not sure where we disagree. Exhibitionist & Voyeur 07/15/18: College Night Ch. How to send users in the right direction before they post asking for the wrong technique? This psychological phenomenon affects everyone, novices and experts alike. 04 (4.83) Sandy and Jack with Sabine. B: Wasn't it your childhood dream to be a firefighter? 2 comments. Many years ago, after my Oracle DBA turned to me (his sysadmin) and said, wearily, ", @tgm1024 It's about avoiding wasting a lot of time for. Meditation: Get an app on your phone, plug in your headphones, and listeneven a few minutes will help. Read transcript. This thought may surface in times of heightened stress, but it can also be a manifestation of a mental health condition, such as anxiety, panic disorder, or depersonalization. Old School New Body Reviews: Does it Really Work? They showed me things I might remember, and I started remembering people and things again. If there are other solutions which you believe will be suggested and which you've already ruled out, then don't try to avoid going over them again instead state why you've ruled them out, as this gives more information about your requirements and helps others provide better answers. Many of the symptoms are related to your stress response (fight or flight response) being triggered. Did neanderthals need vitamin C from the diet? The only place to visit for all your LFC news, videos, history and match information. An XY problem seems to be a subset of the Einstellung effect, where a problem-solver gets stuck on a particular solution and is unable to backtrack mentally to see potentially superior solutions. Antidepressant medications work to increase the levels of Serotonin in the brain. @tgm1024 That is literally what you already said before. I feel like I'm not in reality sometimes like everything looks different and clearer to me. The normal user thinks, mistakenly, in terms of exact congruence. "Yes, I got more memories back today!" When I want to help someone, I want to know not only their X question, but how it is that they are currently thinking (the Y). We react to stimuli differently when we are in a state of heightened stress, and may flinch at sudden noises and generally feel on edge. I feel like Im literally going insane. I'm remembering my past! Do they honestly believe that they are good people?? Your life gradually becomes more stressful for any number of reasons such as work, school, military, life, family, romance and even getting married. Up to 75% of people have experienced dissociation at one time or another. Not sure. The wrong hypothesis is not self-evident, but when we simplify, we amplify the wrong effects, and it becomes more evident. Brand Perception: What is it & How Do We Measure it. (Maybe it will turn out to be OK with the employee to raise parking rates, in exchange for a cost of living raise). You've met the OP on their terms and answered their question. Not without simply throwing your program requirements at SO and asking them to do your design for you (not recommended). The next game, the same player fails to see a faster 3-move mate because they are stuck on the idea of a 5-move mate. I feel like I'm going insane. Get express delivery & free returns. Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. How many of us have ever tried to do something, just to see if we could? "Similar" has a specific geometric/triangle technical meaning, that via combining zoom, rotate, slide and/or flip an object exactly covers another. When depressed, our brain torments us with the most uncomfortable memories or thoughts it can find in our head. People answering the question find it frustrating because the proposed solution doesn't make sense to them since they are approaching the problem from a fresh angle and are (presumably) not being affected by the Einstellung effect, and they find it difficult to get the original poster to clarify their question. The good news is that if you are self-aware enough to have this thought, its not likely that you are actually losing your mind. If the employee can aim for X instead of Y, then the universe of solutions remains open / unrestricted, and the employer can be recruited to help find possible solutions to X. All copyright go to " The Holly Springs Disaster " .THE HOLLY SPRINGS DISASTER[Motion Sickness Love]I Feel Like I'm Taking Crazy Pills. It's NEVER their fault! we're in the middle of a group project and my friends and i are all in the same group (surprisingly). What people assume is that there are 2 small & 1 large technically similar triangles & the puzzle arises from the fact that there are only 2 triangles--the small ones--& they're not technically similar. How does legislative oversight work in Switzerland when there is technically no "opposition" in parliament? At this point, your boyfriend becomes totally confused as none of this makes sense to him. Discuss the OP's attempted solution. Other: In java you don't need to do that. How is the merkle root verified if the mempools may be different? Although, if you start off with Y instead of X, you may have to ask why 10 times (or more, apply the 5 whys to every level?). What Is DPDR (Depersonalization/Derealization Disorder)? Q: I was trying to use built-ins to get the number between something like this in a string "attribute1: 50.223, attribute2: 442.1", Q: I thought there may have been some built in parsing stuff, D: pairs = [x.strip() for x in s.split(",")]; attribs = {k: v for x in pairs for k, v in [x.split(": ")]} Your situation is very treatable. Contrast with "frame challenges", which are now discouraged or prohibited on a number of SE sites: @Sridhar-Sarnobat In your analogy, an XY question would be something like, "How can one inhibit the growth of cell types. he showed me a picture of what it "should" look like, and it Ive struggled with anxiety and depression for years, but my anxiety is so bad right now that it feels like Im about to break and go crazy. i feel so confused. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. @PeterKrauss In a sense. one of the things (or maybe the only thing) stopping me from not harming anybody is my friends, whom i now subconsciously call dream characters along with all of the others in my life. (cont) So I wonder if there is any way to change the home directory for one thread. Usually people who have this thought are experiencing more stress than usual, are recovering from a trauma, or are experiencing an uptick in an anxiety disorder, panic disorder, or another mental health condition. This is the main reason for which they often wrap us around their little finger, not "pussy", as most people believe. Watch game, team & player highlights, Fantasy football videos, NFL event coverage & more Testing attribute self axis fails, Help us identify new roles for community members. Does the collective noun "parliament of owls" originate in "parliament of fowls"? A Glory Hole Swinger's Party (4.30): A new experience form Roxie's party. You go onto a Q&A forum and ask, "How do I get rid of the rats in my kitchen?". Originally published by Dr Joseph M Carver, PhD on June 10, 2008 and last reviewed or updated by Dr Greg Mulhauser, Managing Editor on June 10, 2008. https://askthepsych.com/atp/2008/06/10/fighting-with-myself/. Is there any reason on passenger airliners not to have a physical lock between throttles? In some cases that answer may be "Y is not possible". It depends on the asker's overall knowledge of the problem space. Dissociative Disorders. Takes you closer to the games, movies and TV you love; Try a single issue or save on a subscription; Issues delivered straight to your door or device I'm holding out that the other programmer centric SE sites don't so irreparably screwup like they did. I feel like I'm going crazy, very self conscious. If you're considering ending things, please first take a few minutes to call the suicide hotline. I made solid attempts to boil all of my questions down to as much of a "Y" as possible. json or yaml, is preferred when possible, Q: This code actually comes from HTML My body will not calm down. What would your narc say to gaslight or manipulate you? This disconnection can make you feel like your thoughts are out of your control and that something is wrong with you. both of these changes happened in school. im terrified that ill feel this way for the rest of my life and theres nothing i can do about it. Would salt mines, lakes or flats be reasonably found in high, snowy elevations? If you are dealing with symptoms of anxiety, panic, or depersonalization/derealization, it can be helpful to seek professional mental health help, particularly if your experience is intense, is interfering with your day-to-day life, or doesnt seem to respond well enough to self-care and other forms of stress relief. EDIT: he showed up somewhat unexpectedly a couple hours after i posted this ("i saw your car in the driveway so i thought i'd stop by and take a look now"), he agreed it needs flashing, that he wasn't supervising the workman closely enough, and is going to place flashing next week. Women are much more emotionally complex than men. So if youve done that today or any day, Im proud of you. All of us experience and process stress in our own way, but when the stress is prolonged and particularly intense, it can make us feel like we are out of control, or like we are losing our minds.. WebThis is What Will Happen with Instagram, Facebook and Tiktok Whether You Like it Or Not; 2023 is Going to be Bad for Marketing, But Theres Hope. Listen to the comments about your question, and try to clarify, try to work editing the question if necessary: if there are people commenting, it is a notice that you can invest more time in your question. Luckily, after I came out to all of our friends about what he did, he deleted a lot of his social media and Reddit is all thats left. WebHow to Feel Together When You Are Apart . D: Changing the source to use a well known format, e.g. This particular answer reminds me of Maslow's Hammer. Thanks @couling (!). Recently I started remembering everything I ever did, playing with it all in my head and feeling guilty about it. 02 (4.75) Sabine, more time with Jack. Even though the OP probably needs something else, never neglect to answer the question they have actually asked first and not the question you think they want answered. so much as a repository of answers. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines. I can feel it getting worse. Stackoverflow, IMO, is not meant as a repository of experts (sorry, folks!) Should Stack Exchange in general be awarding "A"s for Effort? 1 Grab this Vitamix blender while its $100 off its super powerful, plus it wont look hideously ugly on your countertop Don't wait to place your order. If someone asks for more information, or especially a more specific question, do provide details. It's correct also to simplify the problem and explain with more focus on the point. Instead of asking about context X, you ask about context Y. I have talked to my parents and priest and they feel I am overreacting, and it has to be real traumatic to block it out, but I have myself convinced. They don't understand that sometimes you don't have the luxury of choosing the right approach and just. Thank you, {{form.email}}, for signing up. I have a part time job working as a cleaner, and Ive been having panic attacks every day on the job. during both of these days, i was around my friends but i never really talked to them, mostly just spacing out and probably overhearing their conversation. He also obviously is not a feminist if he abused me the ways he did and cheated on me. Sometimes increased anxiety can also trigger an episode of depersonalization or derealization that can also feel like losing your mind.. She completely blindsided me by saying she wasnt happy anymore and wanted to end things. Panic attacks include physical symptoms like increased sweating, trouble breathing (even hyperventilation), racing heartbeats, nausea, dizziness, and chest pain. Like if someone says something like "put the cart before the horse" even if they've never heard it before they at least have a hint that something is backwards (horses pull, not push). My body will not calm down. today, there seemed to be another mindset change. Think back to when you were a kid and wanted something for your birthday so much and were so sure that you were going to Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I suggest that you answer the question in three parts and give them in the following order. Add. The name has literally nothing to do with what it is describing. I was dumped by my ex about 2 months ago shortly before my birthday after we had an argument over her cancelling on plans we made together to go spend time with her friends. Stack Exchange network consists of 181 Q&A communities including Stack Overflow, the largest, most trusted online community for developers to learn, share their knowledge, and build their careers. Forever can As for the pain you are going through, I wish I knew what to tell you. Our material is not intended as a substitute for direct consultation with a qualified mental health professional. The sooner you begin treatment, the sooner youll return to a healthy young woman who is planning to get married. Sci-Fi & Fantasy 01/24/17 How many transistors at minimum do you need to build a general-purpose computer? There is a buzzing in my head. WebThis puppy is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of the movie to get the dialogue. i helped out, but half of the time i felt like i could only sit and contemplate the dream world i'm in. 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